Dear Mr. Skunk,

I know this letter is long overdue since we have been neighbors for a while, but I know that you know I have been busy, plus since you moved out of my heating vent I haven't seen or smelled you in a while.


I just wanted to say thank you for not spraying my dog in the face this morning like you did last time. Luckily, you only got the top of his head this time and he didn't have an uncontrollable fit of vomiting all over me and my house. The foaming drool wasn't missed either. Our eyes did sting a little as I washed him in the tub, delaying my morning shower for a good 20 minutes, but hey, beggars can't be choosers.


Now, I am all for sharing the world with nature's creatures, but could you find it in your heart to not hang out by my fish pond, especially in the morning or evening when I let my dogs out to pee. Besides, I am pretty sure the raccoons called dibs on that spot.


Well, not sure when I will see you again, but I sure know my coworkers and classmates will appreciate the nice scent you've left me reeking of for the rest of the week.


THANKS!
Darya